Wednesday, December 19, 2012

There is a Spiritual Lesson Behind  Marital Stress During The Holiday’s

-Every marriage must first be grounded, steeped and honored within a sacred timeless intimate spiritual union and understanding of each soul’s purpose before the two can try to do or be anything else for anyone else outside of that union. –

Christmas is about accepting the death of the old you and joyously rebirthing into the new and it’s exactly because of this suddle yet radical inner change,  many married couples feel more stress during this time of the year more than any other. However, if you aware of your life’s higher purposes, your essential and core reason for being, the holiday season can be a beautiful and graceful rebirth into the new you.

     What’s Your Inner Foundation Made of ?

Most marriages/relationships are based on the premise of conditional Love. conditional Love is a fictional Love that constantly fluctuates and often tally’s up what you do or don’t do for later upheavel or reward.

And it’s precisely because of conditional Love’s fickle egotistical shallow nature that so much confusion from illusions surface during this time of the year.

Conditional Love always meets frustration because the bulk of it’s main foundation is based on constantly needing, desiring or wanting the other person to ‘do’ something in order to be happy.

This type of ‘Love’ is short sighted, it has never had enough room for unlimited expansion because it is based on insecurities, fear of loss, force, threats and so forth. It isn’t unlimited like true Love which is unconditional and unassuming.

True Love or unconditional Love is the only Love that transcends space and time and expectations.

Most of us are looking for that Love that transcends space and time, we yearn for a meaningful and profoundly deeper connection with someone who is really connected to their higher loving purposes in life.

True Love also unconditional Love never feels the need to place false conditions or even force, in fact it’s king at allowing and accepting who you are at any given moment in time.

It may not agree with your decisions but because of it’s previous commitment to live life to the fullest, it has the resiliency to accept who you are and what you feel is best for your personal inner growth at any given moment in time.

I recently came across an incredibly beautiful story written by Lauren Sher in Good Morning America. The story was about a couple who had been married for 80 years! Now this story in particular moved me to curiosity, I mean after all, how many couples do you know that stay together for half of that time?

I felt inspired to discover more about how they had got on so well for so long and what their secret was!

For starters, I found out unlike most couples who take the traditional route of a big white wedding, this now elderly couple spontaneously whisked away and eloped! In their interview, the woman stated that her parents would have never agreed to their union because of his lack of financial means.

So basically if it had been up to her parents they would have never been together!
Another aspect that made this story so intriguing and interesting to me was that they talked openly about how they had come to peace with accepting each others imperfections. Another sign of true unconditional Love.-

As I took mental notes, I began to understand how they had chose to allow Love be king and the leader in their relationship verses fear and expectations. How many of us miss that point? Does Love have to be complicated when it’s really a gift?

Isn’t that the whole point of real Love? Acceptance of what is?  Accepting that you are both not perfect and allowing the illusion of perfection to die so that you can meet the soul you really fell in Love with?

Sure, it’s easier to be in Love with someone who you feel is perfect but unconditional Love chooses to stay and seek new undiscovered depths and boundaries of Love especially after the illusion of infatuation has fled.

Treat Each Other The Same Way You Did When You Were Dating

So many married couples revert back to this statement more than any other statement ever said: ‘ I don’t know who you are anymore! I thought you were somebody different, now I know!’  Please excuse me for a moment while I go take a hardy break and have a good laugh!

We can perceive whatever we want to perceive from another person but did you know that it takes a lifetime just for someone to find out everything about themselves?

I mean getting ourself to follow our mind and soul’s intentions is challenging enough, so why would you place such weight and unhealthy expectation on someone you Love?

Most of us just don’t have that kind of time in these physical bodies, so learning how-to accept your significant other as soon as possible will bring back a great sense of inner peace and Love into your relationship this season.


I don’t know why so many married couples feel the need to ‘fix’ their mate. *sigh*.
Did you carry that restrictive attitude when you met each other?  No, you didn’t. Most married couples wait until they get married before they work arduously on ‘changing’ the other.

Remember what you said when you first met ? ‘I Love so and so because he/she UNDERSTANDS ME AND ACCEPTS ME FOR WHO I AM.

What happened to that mantra? If your significant other knew how really controlling, manipulative and forceful your ego really was, they never would have married you in the first place! 

The most successful relationships by far are those who value and understand the freedom that comes from acceptance. Would you prefer to be right or do you want to be happy? Because what’s ‘right’ to you may not feel right to someone else!

We are all varying perspectives of God who for the greater and often unconscious reason of expanding the well and depth of Love, choose to share our paths. Your relationship with your significant other should always be viewed as it really is; A beautiful gift who chose to share his or her paths with you.

Honor that, respect it and be thankful for the gift of Love but never abuse that knowledge! To do so, is to willing make your Love a burden, responsibility and a compromise.

Choosing to allow and accept your significant other as they are is true freedom and real Love. Marriage has always been an excellent way of practicing acceptance and allowance and that’s why so much conflict arises when two decide to share one path. It’s an art form, and like any art it's gets better with practice. Let’s face it, you weren’t born married, so you are both bound to see aspects of each other that are less than desirable but in the real world no one is perfect .

Lifelong Love is not for those looking to dwell in the realm of egoic delusion. It is for soul explorers who are consciously aware of how each time they choose to spend time judging their mate, they have just bumped into a level of inner resistance that they need to work on within themselves.

Related Article Links:
Married Couple together for 80 years:

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